Like many of you may experience at times, I sometimes feel like I’m drowning, struggling to keep my head above water. At work, I am juggling report writing, MARSS reporting, data collections, progress reports, evaluations, scheduling meetings, paperwork, scheduling time to see all my students and getting everything done within the timelines. It seems like it never fails that when things are busy, that’s when a handful of referrals come in too.  Then there all the things for life at home-cooking, cleaning, running kids here and there, and trying to spend quality time with the family. I feel like I need one of these head floaty things for babies to keep my head above the water. (So, if you see me walking around with one of these on – without the same calm expression the baby has-but with more of a crazed look in my eyes, you will know I am feeling a bit “swamped” at the moment. 🙂 )

When I feel like this, I sometimes wonder, Why am I here, doing this, putting myself through this?- there has got to be easier jobs out there – like the Walmart Greeter- I could do that: smile, say “Welcome to Walmart”, hand out stickers to children, point people in the direction of the service desk for returns.
On days like that, I open my drawer desk drawer and pull out a file folder that holds notes and pictures from families and children I have worked with over the years, one of which is a very special letter to me. This letter was written by a parent of a former student of mine.  Here is the letter, (Their names have been omitted to protected their identities)

I’m sure you will be as excited as I was to hear that after almost two long years of waiting (child) finally has an appointment to see the specialist next Tuesday. When I got the phone call I found myself overwhelmed with emotions and memories of the journey that brought us here. I felt compelled to share with you what a pivotal role you played in our lives! When you started working with (child) I felt (s/he) was grossly misunderstood, you gave (him/her) understanding. I had been blamed for (child’s) shortcomings for soo long that I had started blaming myself. I was giving everything I had to help (him/her) learn and grow, and it just didn’t seem like enough. I felt like I was failing (him/her). Then you came into our lives. You were kind, patient, understanding and empathetic. Not only to (child) but to me as well. You were the first one to tell me that I was doing a good job with (him/her), you helped me to see that it wasn’t my fault. It renewed my strength and gave me hope. You pointed me in the right direction to find the answers and help we so desperately needed. You were the first person that (child) really connected to and trusted besides myself. I know (s/he) would not be where (s/he) is today without you! You shed light into our world when it was very dark, which makes you nothing less than a miracle! I will always be great-full for the kindness you gave to us. You will always hold a special place in my heart! So I thought it important to let you know how truly special you are! Thank you for everything!
Sincerely,
(child’s Mom)

This is why I chose this profession. This is why I am here. This is why I do this job. Not to get these letters, but to make families and children feel this way.  To make real connections with them. To give them a voice. To give them understanding. To give them support, so they know they’re not alone and that there is help. To know they have someone in their corner. This is what I love about my job. Yes, there are probably easier, emotionless jobs out there, but I won’t trade the job I have for one of those. These benefits outweigh the busyness/stress of the job.
My students and families are very special to me. They each have a special place in my heart. Working with the children and their families does not feel like a “job” to me. The “job” part is the paperwork 😉 .

So, if you are ever feeling like you are drowning, I saw a few places online where we can buy these head floaty things- or we can take a moment to breath and find that sense of purpose again in a letter, a memory, a picture, or whatever it is that takes you there, and recharge to tackle the waters and make it through with our heads held high.